Happily Arranged..

My life was going normal.. And suddenly I woke up on the morning of 22nd Oct.. Whaoo.. Surprised or shocked.. Don’t know.. But I’m ENGAGED! To who..? Lemme check my phone.. wow.. he’s mine..

I don’t know how long will it take me to digest all the feelings and understand that this all is for real..

All I know that it shall be real quick because I don’t want to lose these precious moments of our togetherness..

I wanna live each and every moment of this phase thats flying away so fast.. Its already seven days since the first day we met..
The first time I saw you..I remember how you came and sat right in front of me.. I could barely look at you, only when you were asking me questions.. which were quite many..

I remember that car ride so well.. It was so pleasant.. I felt so safe and comfortable being with you.. As if all my secrets are always safe with you..

You are really special.. I adore the sound of your voice.. whenever we’re on a call.. I’m in another world.. And its amazing being there..
As if something had planned everything since forever.. And I just had to say ‘Yes, its you I wanna be with..’ Because everything felt perfect.. All the pieces of the puzzle falling at the right places..
It may take time.. but I’ll be all you want..

P.s. The flowers are beautiful.. And so is this feeling..

Advertisements

Cheers!

I’m more scared of people who talk good about me. Because I’ve to live up to their expectations. I’ve to maintain that level at least. For people who talk bad about me, I’m glad because I don’t have to care. They are not giving me any responsibility. And people who don’t talk about me are the best. These people are amazing.. They’ve a life.

Perspective

People who DO will always reach somewhere, people who don’t, will definitely not, talent matters if your actions matter to you.

She got married and has two beautiful children, and is living a good life but those glittering eyes are calm now. I sometimes feel maybe I should have encouraged her. In reunions, we talk about the writings of Anita Nair, Chetan Bhagat, Arundhati Roy and the great Amish Tripathi! Not even the same genre.

My hate-like friend, was the most influencing persons I had known or will ever know. She spoke too much, yet the listeners managed to enjoy. This girl lagged in every task, accomplishing better than the perfect ones.

Her friend would ask, “why don’t you write? You should write more often.”
“I have to. Sadly, Ive so much work..” she would say, “I’ll finish it first and start on writing next week when I go to London. It will be all calm for me and..” That was Betty.

It was so genuinely convincing, but briefly, she was a powerful drag. That was her actual talent. Through her, I knew her friends were good people. Including me.

Every time, she would have this fear of failure and degraded to the worst level when she had to prove herself. She was like a dodder, always relying on others for comfort and encouragement. Dependent completely. I never liked her much, for her unsatisfactory behaviour, so demanding and the pitiful character she was becoming. She judged people close to her and was extremely ignorant towards the rest of the crowd. More so, because she thought low of herself and did not know how to converse with someone. She could continue thinking about one thing for months, that was the importance she had for time in her life. That was the mere importance Betty gave to herself. People loved her because she was kind and could keep herself in others shoes and think rationally.
I hated her because all her kindness, judgements and talents and life was wasting in vain.

Compared to her, people with no talent were at better stands, more known and appreciated.
In life, I saw no hope for her, nor did I expect, unlike her ‘good’ friends.
Living life knowing you could have done better is not plenty enough. Talent is directly proportionate to actions. Having the courage to live and struggle for that dream, putting in that effortful hard-work, the wisdom of choice over the choices, leaving those preferential perks, gets you where you think you could ‘easily’ be.

That person you compare yourself with is far ahead because you do not have the spark to achieve. They have given up on things that you can’t, respect them. Try reaching them, not comparing or criticising. They made a mark, but you are just happy and satisfied in comparison. Thats the difference!

Missing Someone

Missing someone becomes an important part of ourselves. How we smile and frown again and again living the same memories. There are people who try to fill this distance we have between us and real happiness. But no matter what they think, they cannot really understand what’s going on at the back of our mind. The memories that are constantly knocking to take you away from present. The way we struggle to live the moment that’s in front of us. No, we are not sad or depressed and neither are we alone, we are just taken away. A part of us has been lost that cannot be found.

We only want normality. Every piece of the life’s puzzle to be in harmony. We are not heartbroken. We want ensure safety to ourselves, we don’t want to hurt. We are not loners. We are survivors of the gusty waves that took us away. We are not the most sensitive or a rock person. We are real souls who are looking for real things in life and people. We don’t want love. Just a little hope, that life is worth it. We find calmness in living with ourselves, the memories.

All about fear 2

Yes. I’m scared. With every passing minute I’m scared. I’m scared that every wall that I’ve built will fall down. That every dream that I have hidden will come out. I’m scared that I’ll start living again. I’m scared that my heart may again start controlling my mind. I’m scared that I’ll start doing everything that I gave up.
Then a day will come, you will show that you are not this. You never were. It was all I had presumed. It wouldn’t be your fault. It had to be mine. I’ll lose everything. Even when I had somewhere known all my fears, even when I had noticed all the little things that warned me.. I let myself loose. My heart will not be broken, because then, I wont have one.

All about fear..

Some people are so good and amazing that they just by being around make you feel secure. That nothing in this world can touch you.. no misery, no loss, no heartbreak. But these people seem more dangerous .. for we fear.. losing them.. to something.. because we have already lost so much..
Everyday we pray that the person is not fake.. is not laughing at you every second.. at your stupidness for trusting them.. at your innocence..
And one day they break your dreams. They break their promises. Everything shatters. The world laughs at you and you laugh along. What were you thinking!